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Writers: Reject Rejection!
By Larry Barkan
Are you afraid of rejection? Do you get discouraged when no one seems interested in what you have to write? How do you stay positive and keep going in the face of rejection or, even worse, indifference? Here's a true story that, I hope, will assist you in finding the courage to keep writing. This comes from a Podcast interview I heard with Eli Wiesel on "Bob Edwards’ Weekend" (for the full interview go to http://podcast.com/episode/27369284/32910/?cp=1125). Wiesel, as I’m sure you know, is a Holocaust survivor, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1986 and author of 57 books including “Night,” the testament to his survival in Auschwitz and Buchenwald. Following his liberation from Buchenwald, Wiesel wanted to emigrate to Palestine, but the British were preventing Jews from doing so. Charles DeGaulle, the French President, heard of their plight and offered them refuge. Through a series of coincidences, Wiesel ended up working as a choir director because he loved music and because of all the beautiful girls in the choir whom he “fell in love with consecutively” but, and here’s the part you must get, “I was too afraid of rejection to ask out.” I could barely hear the rest of the interview. “Afraid of rejection!?!!?” After Auschwitz? After Buchenwald? Fear of rejection must be such a human phenomenon that it never gets erased. I was reminded that the truly courageous person is not one doesn’t fear rejection, but rather recognizes that true courage is not the absence of fear, but continuing to act in the presence of fear. So, reject rejection! If Eli Wiesel has this fear, how can you expect not to? Susan Jeffers offers us writers profound advice in the title of her terrific book, “Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway” (go to http://www.susanjeffers.com/home/index.cfm).
I have been an author, motivational speaker and business consultant since 1984. I have three passions: The first is my wife of 37 years. The second is challenging conventional wisdom. The third is dogs and their welfare. I am the author of "Everyone Wins! Playing The Game of Conflict Resolution In All Your Relationships" as well as "Present and Persuade: Create Talks and Speeches That Capture Hearts and Change Minds."
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I am married to a full time romance writer and she has had her share of rejection over her career. She writes most of her books by thinking out of the box. Several publishers have rejected her stories because she didn't "follow the formula". What we have found interesting is many of her fans love her books simply because she doesn't "follow the formula". There is no preconceived ending. Unexpected twists and turns make for a book readers can't put down. Her "weakness" has become her "strength". I supported her during those early failures and encouraged her to go on. She now has over 80 books available. Great Intel.
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
I can vouch for the "twists and turns" in her books. Her podcasts alone have kept me on the edge of my seat (and sometimes falling off it).
Thank you for sharing this story, Larry. Fear is responsible for so many of our other responses. In most cases, it is negative thoughts about something that never comes to pass.
Best wishes.
Frederick
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Thanks, Frederick. "False Evidence Appearing Real." I'm sure you've heard that.
Your intel was good! It got me thinking. Why was he afraid? Even of rejection? Eli Wiesel probably felt vulnerable to the influences of sensuality and emotion. It was probably because of a wave of new experiences, realizations and feelings that he had never had to deal with before. In fact, probably quite the opposite to what he had experienced before. I can understand the feeling he may have had, even with expressions of commitment which were probably foreign to him. He may not have know how to minimize feelings of rejection - or embarrassment - if one didn't share his interest. So, although a very brave man in the face of terrible circumstances .. he didn't know how to handle this other new experience. Hmmmm
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Interesting perspective. Another possibility is that even the Holocaust didn't erase the human emotions he shares with all humanity. Thanks for the comment.
I was thinking of your interesting title. I was thinking about how similar it is to Contractors:Contract Contractions! Sore muscles is something I know a little about.
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Wood Florists: Floor Your Wood (okay, that's a stretch). Thanks for your comment.
That's OK! I have a board stretcher.
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
You are so funny!
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